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Can Your Driving Impact Your Personal Brand? 0

I was driving last week.  I was creeping along slowly in a back-up situation where the traffic I was in was trying to merge onto a major highway.  So all of us who wanted to merge were in the right lane, while traffic that was not merging was to our left going by us very quickly since they were not backed up.  Now whenever I’m in a situation like that I do as I’ve been taught in driver’s education- I leave one car length between me and the car in front of me.   I do this for safety reasons so if I had to break hard, I wouldn’t hit the car in front of me.

Unfortunately some lazy, crazy, impatient and hostile drivers see this one extra car length I’ve left in front of me as a sign to come from my left and merge quickly into that spot- instead of waiting their turn in line behind me.  This happened twice as I waited in traffic to merge last week.

As I sat there, I started to think and form my impressions of these drivers. You’ve already read above how I labeled them as lazy, crazy, impatient and hostile.  It got worse the longer I sat there.  Then I started to think- what if I actually knew these drivers personally?  How bad would they look in my eyes if we ended up driving to the same meeting and got out of our cars at the same time?

What does this mean for you?  Well, first of all drive like everyone knows you.  Would you want someone you know to see you cutting off others? Second, anything you do please do with the understanding that others could see you and judge you.  It’s not just your driving.  Act as if the whole world knows you- it will bring integrity and honesty into all your daily actions and that is a fabulous place to build a quality personal brand.

Posted on: 11-7-2011
Posted in: Anger, Behavior, Personal branding, Uncategorized

Your Personal Branding & Negotiation Basics: Confronting 0

negotiations and confrontations and your personal brand personal branding

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I define negotiations as when we work side by side with another party to come to a mutually beneficial result.   Being able to successfully negotiate speaks volumes about your personal brand, as I discussed in this blog post.

In all my years as a lawyer negotiating various agreements with tons of parties, I always found the best way to approach a successful negotiation was with the intention of having a peaceful interaction.  That said, the problem always comes up when we look at one of the fundamentals of negotiation:  confronting another party.

The term “confront” has a really bad vibe and meaning in our every day language.  We often hear people refer to someone as being “confrontational”.  What image or personal brand does that conjure up in your mind?  For most of us we envision someone being very aggressive, even angry, with their finger pointing at the other party and barking orders.  Am I close?

In my world,  “confront” is a great term. It means you can stand up to a situation and handle it successfully.  There is nothing wrong with confronting a situation as long as you do so peacefully with the intention that both you and the opposing party succeed and walk away content.    Standing up for yourself and explaining your wants and needs requires looking people in the eye, being totally present to them and the situation, and communicating effectively by using your words carefully.  I’m always encouraging clients to look at negotiations and confrontations as a way of connecting with people in a positive way.

Any situation you can’t confront and handle, handles you and leaves you without control.  That translates into an unsuccessful personal brand.

Posted on: 06-6-2011
Posted in: Anger, Behavior, Communication, Confrontation, Negotiating, Personal branding, Poor Image

Passive-Aggressive Communication and Your Personal Branding 0

As I work with more and more companies, I get to see the impact of effective and ineffective communication on the business culture, employee morale, productivity and overall success of a business.  In keeping with the theme of communication this month, I thought we’d reflect on passive-aggressive communication.

When I interview prospective employees, for myself and for clients, an important question I ask them is always, “If you had an issue/problem/concern with me as your supervisor, what is the first thing you would do?”  Unfortunately, a frequent response is that the prospective employee would run their concern by others in the office. WRONG!

In my opinion the correct answer is to come to me and directly address your concern/issue with me.  In this way, there is open and direct lines of effective communication between us and not second-hand conjecture as to what may be going on with me. I have found that most passive-aggressive people cannot bring themselves to confront an issue in the workplace head on in order to seek resolution. Instead, they will go to others in an attempt to “figure it out” but really it is more of a method of making themselves feel better and making the other party involved wrong.  As a result, they tend to stir up conflict with other staff.  The end result is a poor reflection of the entire business and brand.

In addition since passive-aggressive people cannot confront an issue to get it resolved and clarified, they tend to build up all this anger and resentment. They just often have the wrong target to displace this anger and resentment.  Since they cannot see that they are the problem, they then focus on their supervisor or other employees.  Their resentment and anger often translates then into quiet acts of business sabotage or poor performance.  All the while they smile and pretend they love their job and environment and themselves. When asked what is the problem, often these people will deny a problem existing.

The key here is that if you cannot confront an issue, the issue confronts you and you will never have a resolution and peace and a good work life. There is nothing wrong with confrontation as long as it is done peacefully and with a good intention for optimal results for both sides.

What does this mean for you and your personal brand?  If you allow passive-aggressive people into your workplace, effective communication will cease to exist in your organization and your personal brand and business brand will reflect this lack of communication.  If you are a small business owner or an individual who communicates from a passive-aggressive posture you will likely leave people with a poor first impression. Clients, prospects and personal relationships will be confused by your behavior at best. Most often, people will give up on you after a while and remember you as that “hard to read” person who “didn’t make much sense but always seemed upset somehow”.   This will translate into lost business, being fired, not getting hired and lost personal relationships.

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Posted on: 03-22-2011
Posted in: Anger, Behavior, Business Brand, Communication, Job Search, Personal branding, Poor Image, Uncategorized